shut up, I won’t

You know the great thing about blogs.

I can update this baby as many times as I want, while also not dealing with the creeping anxiety that comes with feeling your taking up too much internet space. You know that feeling.

Like right after you post a status on Facebook and then you hear a good song and you’re all like “omg, I have to post this lyric because it expresses my soul” but then you don’t want to be THAT person.

or you see one of those e cards (how are those still happening?) and you want to post it but, eh, people might start defriending you which is totally a sign that the the world is ending.

So you wait, I mean like literally. Like start a word document with a list of things you want to post but need to find socially acceptable amounts of time in between. Or maybe you tweet  it but you can’t tweet all the time.  We don’t live in a world where you can just experience things. You have to experience them and THEN share them with everyone ever. It’s like we are that kid on the diving board and everyone in the world ever is sitting on the side of the pool eagerly waiting for you to jump. Actually they look away when you jump because, despite what you believe, there is absolutely nothing amazing about seeing someone jump in e-coli filled pool water.

Sometimes my insecurities speak to me and they say things like “maybe you should get real friends, and talk to them. maybe you’re just antisocial and weird.” This is sort of a fact, but that aside, I enjoy talking to myself. I have an attention disorder and most people, conversations and things bore me to no end. I bore myself as well, but I also hold less of a grudge. I even get bored mid conversation, even when I start the conversation, so this is easier. I can easily just stop typing and come back. It’s very odd when you stop a conversation mid sentence and then ask to come back to it a week later. I’ve tried it and somehow, it just hasn’t caught on with the general population. odd.

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